I wish i took more time to just pause for a minute. I have been out here in New York for almost a whole year now and I feel like this is the first time that I've actually taken time to stand still in the moment. To think about things with perspective. I've been running around the city like a chicken with it's head cut off. It's so easy to get caught up in the moment and before you know it another year has passed by. What the hell was I doing this whole time? Life here in this city can be so dangerous, there is so many things to see, do, hear, and eat. I forgot how much I cherish these moments alone in my room left with nothing but my thoughts.
In a city where you are surrounded by so many people all the time, its ironically very easy to feel lonely. To drown in the deep city lights of new york... a city where i feel perpetually lost and at home at the same time.
As I reflect back on this year I can easily think of a millions good times I've had, and with the same ease I can also think of the not so good times. As much as I am happy about what I have accomplished here this past year, I am also full of regret. Regret of how much time I've wasted in this beautiful city. True to form, I am always full of duality, a contradiction in the flesh.
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